Wearing makeup is such an issue in my family. I don't know how it started but the desire to wear or satrting to put lipstick on has always been a signal that someone is on the high side. Whenever my mom is sick she always indicate interest in makeup, and when I start battling the high and low demon, I too will start putting on makeup when I way high in the stratosphere.

It was okay when I was schooling or in U but when I started working it become an issue. Wearing makeup has become a "must" thing for women who are working. So the thing is I cannot overcome the aversion of wearing makeup, cause then I am not sure of the state of my mind, am I well or not.

I had even been fired twice because of this. Luckily the place I am working now is not stressing on makeup just dressing, so I am quite comfortable here, even though there are certain grouses. But for me the most important thing I need is good colleagues and the freedom to be myself, which I have found here. I know I have to move on for better peace of mind but I cannot make myself leave the wonderful friends I have here, I guess until they leave I'll hang on.

I have to admit that I am not really healthy this semester. I know family call me a hypochondriac but what can I say silly stuff made me ill. Stress can play havoc with my body, and my stress level this pass few months have been over the limit, I am surprised I am not dead. But my headache and migrains have made frequent visit that I haven't been off pain killer, now I am afraid that I'll be addicted.

Thank God I have a father who's willing to massage away the pain. Well if ever stop blogging then you'll know that stress had finally put me six feet under.